I have no clue if anyone is still out there, but if you are then I apologize for my prolonged absence. I guess I’ve just had a lot to deal with and have been evaluating what I think of blogging, how it can help me at this point in my life, and what I need to do in general to be truly happy. I didn’t have any motivation to blog and I knew I really needed the break.
I was feeling off for a while. It was definitely a combination of things- school ending, finals (which equals getting no sleep & studying way toooo much –> weird schedule in general), the break up, and everything in between.
To be honest, because of everything that happened with me in high school, I was really unsure of how to feel about this summer. Most of my friends at school could not wait to get home to their high school friends, but I was pretty depressed at the thought of spending my whole summer at home. I decided to embrace it though and things have actually been REALLY great. I have reconnected with old friends and been allowing myself to have fun while not restricting myself or letting my eating disorder dictate whatsoever.
this is going to be a massive post – skip the parts that don’t interest you hahah!!
Rewind a bit and I’ll show you some delicious eats I had at school before I left.
salad bar from the Fresh Market!!
carbs with a side of studying.. perfection.
my new fave veggie- jicama, on a salad DUH
I also have enjoyed some nights out with my high school friends
& then tonight, after many nights with my friends, I spent some quality time with my mom. We COOKED.
Forever & a half ago, this AMAZING woman sent me some pasta I won in a giveaway & it was finally put to good use.
veggies roasted– we put on evoo & saltless seasoning
so yeah, that’s pretty much the pictures I have to display.
I’ve been thinking about a few things with regards to the blog and I also have had some general thoughts about it and life that I thought are worth sharing:
♥ Initially, I blogged about food because I thought it would help me feel better about what I was eating/portion sizes/etc. I needed the support because I was trying to gain weight and get more comfortable with “normal” eating. Now, I can’t decide how much food blogging I’m going to do. To be honest, I do kind of want to continue because I find it to be something that makes it more interesting and I do like to share some of my eats. Obviously I haven’t been sharing all of them lately anyways so I think I’m going to continue to highlight my favorite meals just because it is something that I find kind of fun. If i ever think it is in any way hindering my recovery, I’m going to immediately stop but as of now it isn’t. I don’t usually even remember to take pictures (which I think is a good thing for me).
♥ Blogging cannot be an obligation. It is a total hobby & I don’t wan to lose it because I really do find it to be therapeutic and FUN but I only want to post when I feel like I have something I want to write about! Make sense? hopefully
♥ I am going to stop reading certain ed recovery blogs– NOTHING personal at all but I really don’t have a very good attitude when I read them anymore. The empathy I once had is starting to fade because It frustrates me when I feel that certain people are stuck in their eating disorder, not truly recovering. It isn’t healthy for me to read. I am now more attracted to blogs of girls I feel are really living their lives and this is what will make me the happiest and most able to move forward. I am still here for you though if you want to talk about any of your struggles so please don’t hesitate to contact me!!
♥ I want to write about what makes me happy– whatever it may be that day (seriously.. things could get random) because I think a happy life is a healthy one 🙂 hope you all will follow along!
♥ Life is TOO SHORT not to do things you want to do (within reason… If I did everything I wanted to do i’d for sure be dead, or pregnant, yep i said that). I’ve realized that this is my time to go out with my friends and act like a total idiot, because in a few years, it’s just unacceptable. So I’m trying my BEST to put my ed behind me while still being healthy (because who doesn’t want to be?), and just HAVE FUN, let myself go, & laugh as much as possible. If i want to be happy this summer (and I DO) then I absolutely 100% have to do this.
“We should all start to live before we get too old.
Fear is stupid. So are regrets.”
— Marilyn Monroe
PUMPED to be back- once again, I ask that you forgive meeee 🙂 Love you all!!