Hope you are having a great weekend!!
My week has flown by. Going out on a Thursday night really screws with my schedule. I feel like it should for sure be Sunday right now but it is, in fact, Saturday. Tonight there is no way I am going out haha, I am dead tired.
I’m not sure where to start with my week, so I guess i’ll start with the easiest thing- eats! here are some things I’ve enjoyed 🙂
An Ancho chicken wedge from Einstein’s with sides
I tried a different brand of veggie burgers!
Thursday night my sorority had a social themed “What my roommate made me wear” so naturally, we all looked…errr…interesitng..
yeah, i think you get the point.
The night ended up being a total bust though, I have to say. The frat we were with kind of sucked and the social lasted approximately 45 minutes before we all left and went our separate ways.
I went to Jimmy John’s and got a free pickle out of it- scoreee! I ended up crashing on my friend’s couch.
Yesterday was pretty much a lost day haha- I woke up, went to class (which was shocking), slept, went to my next class, slept, did my short little work out, and got ready again!
I went to a birthday dinner for my friend at a Japanese restaurant called Takara. I got teriyaki chicken/shrimp and ate it ALL- omg it was so much!! LOL. Then last night was just ridiculous. I think i finally fell asleep around 3:30. I plan on taking it easy tonight- I think my body has had enough!
As far as working on staying in the present, I have to say i’ve been doing a lot better. Instead of constantly worrying about what I’m doing next, i’ve been truly trying to just be where I am and enjoy it. I am by no means perfect at it, but I am truly happy that I can at least see some difference.
I’m also still getting used to my new body. However, whenever I feel any sort of negative emotions towards it, I have been able to rationalize them. I’ll admit, it is hard not fitting into some clothes I once felt good in. It is sometime awkward to notice new curves. It is weird to see a picture of myself and not be the smallest girl in it. It is scary that this weight gain happened so quickly. It still irrationally worries me that I will never stop gaining.
But you know what?
Despite how confused and scared I am at times, I wouldn’t go back for anything. Who CARES if i’m not the smallest girl in the room?? WHO CARES that my tiny-ass old clothing doesn’t fit anymore?? WHO CARES that I have some womanly curves that make me look my age??
These aren’t bad. These things are amazing. These things are letting me be energetic, funny, happy, outgoing, loud, crazy, and free again. They are letting me be myself.
so, yes… I am scared at some point almost every day. But I am also happier than i’ve been in months- and for that I am truly thankful.
“The way to develop self-confidence is to do the same thing you fear & get a record of successful experiences behind you. Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice; it is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved.”
( William Jennings Bryan )
Question- Is there anything you want to see more of on my blog? I’ve been thinking about what I want to focus on/things I want to talk about and would love to hear if you have any suggestions!